What Now?
by Boozoo
Summary: Helga is all grown up-she's in college, has a good job, is almost done with her degree, and is still close with everyone from Hillwood. Well ALMOST everyone that is.
1. Chapter 1

I can't believe it. I just CAN'T BELIEVE IT! Arnold Shortman was staying in San Lorenzo and leaving Hillwood? Leaving his friends? His boarding house, the boarders, the treehouse, the softball field? Leaving…..me? I stared in shock as our longtime childhood friends encircled my love God in their arms. They were clearly still feeling the high from finding their lost classmates and discovering that those same classmates found Arnold's lost parents. They couldn't wait to board the plane and let everyone know back home what had happened. It was a miracle in their eyes- and mine up until an hour ago when Arnold announced that he would be staying in San Lorenzo to help his parents establish a new city for the Green Eyes.

I couldn't take it. I started walking away from the tarmac to get some non-miracle filled air. My thoughts were clouded and my sadness was overcoming my anger. We were so close to something. FINALLY, and now he was leaving? That's it? I kicked at the dirt cursing San Lorenzo and it's perfect miracle filled atmosphere. I was still staring helplessly at the ground when I saw his shadow. He placed his perfect hand on my shoulder and turned me to look at him.

"Helga, about what happened back in there in the jungle yesterday…" I put my hand over his mouth before he could say the words that would break the last of me.  
"Heat of the moment right Football head?" I chuckled and shifted back and forth on my feet. "I'm really glad we found your parents, Arnold…..really. You deserve it more than anyone here. Heck, more than anyone I've met. I'd be lyin' if I said I'm not gonna miss some part of your non-stop positivity."

"Helga, I don't want us to go backwards; we both know it wasn't the heat of the moment. I just can't guarantee or promise you anything. You deserve more than that. So much more. You say you're going to miss me, but you don't know how much more I'll miss you. You're the main reason we even found my parents. The reason I'm no longer an orphan. The-"

"Stop it. You don't owe me anything." I started rubbing the back of my neck and kicking at the dirt. "I don't want you to feel like ya owe me or something. How about we look at my helping you out as an apology for all the crap I put you through all of our lives. Okay?"

"Helga tha-"

"Okay Football head?"

"Can I write you?"

I shrugged my shoulders, "I don't think you'll have time."

"I'll make time."

I was about to answer, but I heard the voices calling him over. I looked over Arnold's shoulder, seeing his parents waving him down. My head turned to the left to watch the rest of my 4th grade class standing on the tarmac, some of which were starting to board.

"I'm coming! Just a sec!" Arnold looked at me with such a broken expression that it took my breath away. "Thank you Helga. Thank you for loving me before I knew I loved you too."

I stared at him for a good five seconds in shock, then cleared my throat, gave him an awkward hug that reminded me of my Aunt Trish's bony bear hugs, and started walking backwards toward the tarmac. "Well, I hope San Lorenzo works out for ya. Thanks for the adventure heh heh." I turned my body back towards the tarmac and fast walked my way to the line of kids who weren't currently experiencing a nervous breakdown.

 _ **Ten Years Later**_

"Judy! I'm taking my break, I'll be back in 30!" Throwing on my jacket and swinging open the front door, I barely heard Judy's muffled "okay" as I walked out onto Boston's cold, wintery streets. I loved walking on cold, snowy days when the sun is out. It reminds me a lot of Hillwood and the childhood snowball fights the neighborhood would hold on the weekends. My team always won, of course, but it was still a good time for everyone all around. Even my parents started joining in after Miriam joined AA and Bob finally let my fresh-out-of-business-school sister, Ooooolga become a partner of Pataki Gadgets (Formally known as Big Bob's Beepers) and handle half of the business, giving Big Bob way more free time.

Dragging myself out of my past, I looked up to find that I had already arrived at the local Pizza Pub. Man I loved this place. I could already smell the fresh baked bread and melting cheddar cheese. I waited until the couple that was in front of me went in and took a deep inhale as I pulled open the heavy door and walked in.

"ohhhhhhh, that's the good stuff!" I shouted as I breathed out the luscious garlic after smell.

"That's what she said, Pataki!"

"You're not wrong, Johanssen. That's what your mama yelled last night! Twice!"

"Oh hush up and eat your freakin' deep dish," Gerald chuckled as he slid the still smoking pepperoni with anchovies across the nearest booth.

I took my usual spot in the booth next to the bar. The pub was packed today. Friday lunch was usually like this, but it made me smile knowing that Gerald managed to hold my spot each week for a few minutes while I ate lunch and caught up with him. Gerald started working at Pizza Pub our freshman year at Northeastern University. I was so jealous until I managed to nail down my dream temp job down the street coordinating dance schedules and teaching ballet.

"So, what's up Pataki? Still working the Ballet studio life?"

"Well considering it's been a mere seven days since I've last talked to you last, I would have to tell you Doi! Gerald just rolled his eyes and smiled. "Oh! But I don't know if Pheebs has told you yet or not, but I actually managed to ACE my finals, thankyouverymuch!"

"Wow congratulations Pataki! Although you are getting a degree in English Literature, so how hard can it really be to ace a few of those tests?" He teased.

I threw my napkins at him and opened my mouth wide, giving him an excellent view of my partially chewed slice. I snapped it shut before he could spray ketchup at me. "Oh please, I know most of you Pre-Law majors pay the freshman to write a few of your papers each term," I joked.

"Hey! I object! My amazing C average is proof that I, Gerald Martin Johanssen,have worked hard for my credits. Besides, everyone knows that Cs, do in fact, get degrees. Why would I waste such precious money on that?"

"I don't know, maybe so you could spend even more time making out with my best friend?"

"That's not a bad idea actually—oh don't give me that look! You know I'm joking. Besides, even if I did try that, we all know that either you, Pheebs, or my parents would destroy me. And I'm not sure even _my_ ego could take that," he winked.

I rolled my eyes and proceeded to catch up with Gerald on the local gossip. After my deep dish was simply a dish, I started to clean up my mess and head for the trashcan.

Gerald stood up behind me and started rubbing the back of his neck. "Hey umm, before you go there's something I've been meaning to tell you."

I stopped mid stride and turned around. "What? What is it? Is Pheebs okay? Ugh! I knew all that studying would kill her one day! Where is she? I nee-"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa Pataki. Phoebe is fine and I do mean fine," he said as he wiggled his eyebrows. "I just think you should know that Arnold's grandpa slipped and fell down the front stoop while clearing snow last night. He's not doing so well and I know you're pretty close with his grandparents, especially once Arnold left. I just thought you'd want to know in case you wanted to head to Hillwood this weekend. Pheebs and I have to drop off some things at her parents' house for the wedding anyway, so I figured now would be a great time to go…"

It was true. I loved those old timers. They were practically my family, but there was a good chance Arnold would be there. I hadn't spoken to him since the day he came home and I didn't want to deal with that right now.

Gerald noticed my discomfort, "look I know Arnold's homecoming didn't go exactly how everyone pictured it would, but you need to be an adult and set those issues aside. Grandpa might as well be the entire neighborhood's grandpa and I KNOW you have a really deep connection with you. I just want you to think about it."

I sighed and nodded. "You're right, of course you're right," I laughed. "I don't need to think about it, I'll go. Just text me where we'll meet up and when, okay?"

Gerald smiled, "of course, Helga. Now get out of here and go have fun teaching people to twirl or whatever."

I rolled my eyes, "that's not how I would put it, but alrighty then. Catch ya later!"

Gerald waved me out of the pub. The cold whipped my face making me feel claustrophobic and the sun shined so bright it was giving me a headache. I hated that he could still change my entire attitude just by someone simply saying his name. Ugh! I hated Arnold Shortman. And I DO mean HATE. Not the ten-year-old Helga hate which actually meant love. I truly hate Arnold Shortman now. But there was nothing that would keep me from seeing his ailing grandpa. I would go back to Hillwood, but I would NOT speak to Arnold Shortman.


	2. Chapter 2

The following Sunday, Gerald, Phoebe, and I packed up Gerald's dented, old, reliable Volvo and headed out right as the sun was coming up. The usually exhausting five-and-a-half-hour drive from Boston to Hillwood somehow managed to fly by. The next thing I knew, I was standing on my front stoop staring up at my childhood home. Before all the memories, both good and bad, could flood into my brain, the front door opened. There stood my mother, Miriam Pataki; She yanked me into her arms and pulled me into the house while simultaneously closing the door behind us.

"Oh sweetie! I'm so glad you're home. How do you feel? Are your friends coming inside too? Do you need help carrying in your things?"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, mom it's okay." I smiled at the fact that my mother cared so much about me; Somewhere in the back of my mind I always thought she would relapse, but here she was, her vibrant and enthusiastic self, ten years later.

"Mom, I'm fine, Gerald and Phoebe are heading to see their parents and drop off things for their wedding, and I only brought one suitcase- that's currently sitting on the stoop. I just wanted to drop off my things and go see Grandpa before dinner, if that's okay with you."

My mom bit her lip and said, "Oh! Okay sweetheart, but your father will be home soon if you want him to go with you."

I should've known that something was wrong right then simply by her wanting someone to go with me, but my mind just wouldn't accept that. Grandpa was gonna be fine! He's still in his prime! …Right?

"That's okay mom, I don't plan on staying long since the old timer always pulls through and plus I'm planning on staying with him all day tomorrow. I can't wait to tell him about my new baseball move that helped me finally beat Kim Larson last season! He's gonna laugh his diaper off."

My mom looked suddenly nervous and started to fidget. I stopped talking and looked up at her. "What is it? What's wrong?"

"Honey, a few of the ladies from the neighborhood went to visit him on Wednesday and….well this time it's different. He's fighting pneumonia on top of overcoming his injury and honestly I think since his wife died he just can't keep going. You do realize he's quite old? I mean, he was quite old when you were quite young…..what I mean is that you might have to accept that he may not make it this time."

I knew she was right, but that didn't make it any easier for me to accept. I shook my head and pulled my jacket tighter to my chest. I took a deep breath and spoke softly, "I just don't know what I'm gonna do, you know? He's like the grandfather I never had and he was practically my only family for a good part of my childhood."

I saw my mother flinch slightly from the corner of my eye. I realized suddenly how what I'd said must have hurt her, but that didn't make it any less true.

Bob and Miriam finally realized they weren't Parents of the Year after they received a call saying their daughter was missing in the jungle of San Lorenzo. Neither of them seemed to remember that I had left on a field trip three days earlier or that I had been obsessively drawing and memorizing maps of San Lorenzo for four months. They also apparently hadn't noticed the stack of overdue library books about the history of the Green-Eyed People that was currently taking up most of my room.

When we all came home from San Lorenzo Big Bob realized his youngest daughter didn't seem to care that he'd spent a thousand dollars on tickets to "Satan's Playland" just to pick me up, or that I didn't care that he'd been yelling at me since he dragged me back home, or that I didn't care that we were home, or that I didn't care…about anything. I remember him using my actual name before I went to my room and closed the door, "Helga, what's the matter with you girl?" I didn't answer him that day, or for the next six weeks. I didn't talk to anyone for that matter.

My parents changed during this time, but if I haven't already mentioned, I didn't care. The moments that they'd changed before never stuck, so how was I to know that they'd stick this time.  
The field trip was the last hurrah of the school year, so I didn't have to go to school or see my friends. I stayed inside for weeks. Miriam would remind me to take a bath and eat, while Big Bob would try to get me to talk. He even invited Pheebs over one time, but even she couldn't get me to do much except groan. My parents finally took me to see Dr. Bliss. Since she already knew my history and of my love for Arnold, she was the first person to get me to talk. She helped put things in perspective. She told me to view this time without Arnold as a fresh start. "Figure out who you are without Arnold Shortman, you just might like her."

The days after that appointment with Dr. Bliss I started to come alive again. I talked to Big Bob and Miriam and learned that Miriam had started going to AA with Bob by her side and that Big Bob was looking for a partner to help shoulder his workload. I assumed these changes would be temporary, but I was wrong. Miriam started cooking again, Bob came home on time each night, Olga's visits no longer revolved around her, instead they were opportunities for family time.

Before I knew it sixth grade was starting, but this time was different. My friends knew about my feelings for Arnold (at least on some level), they knew that I was mushy on the inside, and they openly cared about me. Now don't get me wrong, the friendship dynamics were all pretty much the same, but there was a respect and honesty that hadn't been there before. Gerald looked out for me whenever Wolfgang pulled his crap, Harold offered me a bite of his burger every Friday before baseball games, and Pheebs no longer said "ice cream" when referencing Arnold.

As the years passed I learned more about myself. I was smart- like really smart. Pheebs was still Valedictorian, but I wasn't far behind her on graduation day. I was also a great writer; My works included poetry, young adult fiction, and horror stories (I guess our childhood Halloweens rubbed off on me). I won a bunch of awards throughout high school, was editor of the school paper, and even got a few articles into local magazines. I'm now pursuing a teaching degree with a minor in English Literature. Mr. Simmons likes to think he had a lot to do with my pursuits, which he did, but there was no way in hell I was going to teach fourth graders. My preference was geared more towards college students.

Stinky and I started going out Sophomore year. I know, I know, but he was sweet, kind, and taller than me (which was a big deal to me at that time). We dated on and off throughout high school, went to homecoming and prom together, but we eventually broke up senior year when we realized we were better at being just friends than more-than-friends.

Overall things were looking good, but each time I'd get a letter from him, I'd freak. I'd stare at the letter, willing myself to open it but I saw the letter as a trap; a trap that would yank me back to a time where I needed him to make me function. I just couldn't do it. So, I started to pile them in a binder with sleeves and there they stayed for six years, unopened and unread.

"Honey? Honey? Hello?"

"Huh?" I looked up at my concerned mother's face and shook my head. "I'm sorry mom I zoned out, but I have to get going if I want to see grandpa today!"

"Oh. Okay honey, but please text me if you need me or your father to pick you up."

"I'll be fine mom, but thanks!" I shouted as I went for the door.

My mother looked like she wanted to say more, but she let me go.


End file.
